


The Real Jack

by thealphagate_archivist



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Adult Content, First Time, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-03-26
Updated: 2006-03-26
Packaged: 2019-02-02 07:09:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,608
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12721986
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thealphagate_archivist/pseuds/thealphagate_archivist
Summary: Daniel has been attacked and Jack helps him.





	The Real Jack

**Author's Note:**

> Note from the archivists: this story was originally archived at [The Alpha Gate](https://fanlore.org/wiki/The_Alpha_Gate), a Stargate SG-1 archive, which began migration to the AO3 in 2017 when its hosting software, eFiction, was no longer receiving support. To preserve the archive, we began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in November 2017. We e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are this creator and it hasn't transferred to your AO3 account, please contact us using the e-mail address on [The Alpha Gate collection profile](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/thealphagate).

"Okay. Nice." 

I didn't understand the question. "Um...huh?" His look told me I should have been paying closer attention. I felt like collapsing. "Sorry. I just can't seem to keep up today. I think my IQ dropped a few points when we checked into this..." I scanned the dingy room with torn drapes, rusty clothes rack, and damaged carpet. The head-sized hole in the wall next to the bathroom door did nothing to enhance my ease. "...place..." 

"I was just commenting on the décor." 

I saw helplessness in his brown eyes. He stepped toward me. Involuntarily, I took a step back. He stared at me. 

"Daniel, I just don't know what to do here. It wasn't me. You know that in your heart. I'm your friend. I'm the guy who cares about you." 

I sank onto the bed and tried to steady myself. "I know, Jack. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry about everything." 

With a long sigh he sat beside me, pulled me into a loose embrace, and spoke softly in my ear. "It wasn't me, Danny." 

"I know. I know." 

I wanted his touch to make my skin crawl, but it didn't. It scorched my soul, made my throat hurt with yearning. I wanted intimacy with him more than anything I'd ever wanted in my life. I needed him. I loved him. I needed it to be him. 

But it wasn't him. He was innocent. And I felt like the pervert for even thinking such thoughts. 

Jack pulled back and touched his fingertip to my nose. "What can I do to make it all go away?" he asked quietly. 

"I don't think you can," I answered. "Jack, I think I'm going crazy." 

He forced a smile. "Going crazy? You're just discovering this now?" 

I made a feeble attempt at a laugh that sounded too much like a sob. "I just need some time. Be patient with me." 

"No problem. Just know if and when you want to talk, I'm here." 

"You promise?" 

"I'm not going anywhere." 

He tousled my hair, which made me feel even more vulnerable. At least he loves me. I know he does, just not the way I need it. I put on a little smile and sighed. "It's been a long time since I spent the night in a really cheap motel." 

"Yeah, me, too," he said, closing the drapes and checking the lock on the door. "Too bad the Holiday Inn was booked full. We could've watched the Playboy channel all night." He gave me one of his winning grins. "I'm gonna go see if there's any hot water, okay? You get some sleep." 

"Yeah, right. I don't think so, but thanks. I'm going to check out what's on TV." 

Jack disappeared into the tiny bathroom. Picking up the remote, I turned on the television. We had basic cable, which was more than I expected. I found a documentary playing on the History channel, rolled onto my side and tried to let an old white-haired Brit who was talking about some geological spurs in some tiny frozen island just off the coast of Antarctica take over my thoughts. Normally the subject would have fascinated me, but not tonight. After a few minutes of listening to the monotonous dialogue, I closed my eyes and entertained my own introspective, letting the memories of the past few days pass through my mind. I needed time to process.

* * *

It had all started when we met Jovane West, one of the new recruits. He was the brightest kid I'd ever met, full of questions, ambition, and information. His potential was unlimited. Everyone else thought he was the greatest kid in the world. I knew better. I had already sensed his dark side. And in my presence, it just seemed to keep getting darker. 

After a few trips through the Stargate he caught me alone one night and told me that he wanted to share something big with me. He claimed that he had invented a machine that could change his face to make him look like any person of his choosing. I scoffed at first of course, but then he showed it to me. 

It looked like an ordinary laptop computer, but when he punched keys the glow transformed him into the perfect image of Colonel Jack O'Neill. I was mesmerized by the invention. 

"Is this alien technology?" I asked. 

"Nope. This is all me," he answered. "Straight from the genius mind of Jovane West." The tone of his voice was so creepy that I shivered. 

"More like 'straight from hell'," I mumbled, looking closer. "You look just like him." 

"Want a better look? Come here." 

Unwisely, I stepped closer. He grabbed me, shoved me up against the wall, and rained kisses on my protesting lips. I found myself being ravished by this youngster in Jack's body. I was paralyzed at first, inertly susceptible to his amorous attack. I found myself kissed senseless as he groped me. When he attempted to tear away my clothes, I finally found the strength and presence of mind to shove him away. 

West looked at me in surprise, but gathered up his equipment and left me alone. He had actually expected me to submit to him! I couldn't believe how arrogant the little bastard was! 

It was the real Jack who picked me up for work the next morning, the Jack that I now mistrusted unreasonably. 

Jack calmed me with gentle assurances and open-ended questions until I broke down and confessed to him that Jovane had attacked me. He took me straight to the infirmary. 

Dr. Janet Frasier gave me a physical examination and found nothing more than a few bruises. As a medical doctor, she's one of the best but I never realized until that day that she is extremely sympathetic. She seemed to relate to my plight. I found myself confiding in her. I'm afraid I told her everything, even the way I felt about Jack. 

When she noticed my excessive nervousness in Jack's presence she suggested that he take me along on a road trip to go camping or fishing in hopes that our time together would mend the emotional trauma, such as it was. She reminded me that the real Jack would never make an attempt like that and that I should keep that in mind. 

Put the blame where it was, she had said. Direct the resentment away from him. Jack is my friend. 

While we were gone, Jovane West would be investigated. At first, it almost seemed that no one was willing to believe my story. Did they think I just dreamed it up in my demented little brain? 

Well, how could they not doubt my story since it was so fantastical? A young man who had invented a device not involving alien technology that could change his face to look exactly like anyone he chose, in this case Jack O'Neill had made sexual advances upon me? Although we had seen far stranger things, it sounded fictitious, even to me. 

Two days went by and my apprehension of Jack increased. I couldn't help myself. The memories were all too vivid. Sometimes his nearness caused me to shrink into the corner in embarrassment, other times all I wanted was for him to do to me what his look-alike had done. Sometimes my mouth went dry with an incredible hunger for the kisses I had experienced, only I wanted it with the real Jack, my Jack. I wanted him to touch me, to kiss me. 

Only a handful of people knew about the incident and those people lived by the motto 'don't ask, don't tell'. Only General Hammond, Jack, Janet and the investigators assigned to check out Jovane West's past shared my shame but I felt as if the world knew everything about me, that everyone who looked my way knew what had happened and blamed me. This was paranoia. I considered asking Janet about medications. 

Why did I keep torturing myself? 

Janet and I had a long talk on the second evening afterward and she accused me of being even more repressed than our fearless leader, Jack O'Neill. She hoped our road trip would bring on the opportunity for discussion and some of my emotional upheaval would be repaired. 

So Jack and I set off to nowhere in particular, drove all day and checked into this low-rent motel on a Friday night. With the whole weekend off I had until Monday morning to resolve my issues. 

The room had two beds, so there was no sense of threat, no pressure. Jack was being more understanding than I've ever seen him. I needed to get my head together and get back to business.

* * *

"So," he sat on the other bed fiddling with the remote control. "Did you know Hammond ordered Jovane's quarters searched?" 

"I knew he was going to check him out." I propped myself up and hugged my knees. "When?" 

"Yesterday. They found his laptop. Carter's checking it out." 

"Sam knows what happened?" 

"Not what happened between you and West." 

I looked away. "You remember those aliens who took over the base and made themselves look like us?" I reminded him. 

"Yeah. The laptop doesn't have one of their devices in it. I already asked her to check for that." 

"Oh." My little theory was shot to hell. "Well." 

"Yeah." 

I sighed. 

"Maybe it wasn't really the laptop that did it. Those devices had to be programmed to a specific person, and the wearer had to have it against the skin, didn't they?" 

I tried to remember. "I think so. Did anyone check to see if yours was missing?" 

He nodded glumly. "Yeah. It's not missing. They're all locked up tight at Area 51." 

"Oh. They wouldn't have made two?" 

"I'm not that important to them." 

"Jack, sometimes I don't think you realize how important you are to a lot of people. In more ways than you know." 

He chuckled. "Really? Am I important enough to frame for attempted rape?" 

I felt instantly abashed. Head down, I shrugged. "I don't really think that was the intention. I think the boy is just really psychotic. From day one I felt his eyes on me like that. He didn't seem interested in Sam or Teal'c. He kept observing us. You and me. For some crazy reason he wanted to be you and be with me. He's brilliant, but he's seriously deranged." 

"That fine line Freudians are always talking about," Jack reached across to lay a hand on my knee. "You want to talk?" 

I quaked at the thought. "I know that's why we're here, but I don't know if it's a good idea." 

"Sure it is." He smiled encouragingly. "Share it with me, Daniel." 

I laid a hand on top of his hand on my knee and put my forehead on the back of my own hand. "I don't know if it's something his technology did to me or if I was just immobilized with fear and wonder. But I almost..." 

"Almost what, Daniel?" 

"I almost let him." 

He gazed at me patiently waiting for me to continue. 

"Fighting him off was an afterthought." 

He nodded, subdued. "I'm sure it was part of the technology, Daniel. Stop beating yourself up about it. He's smart enough to know that you could probably hold your own against him, so he probably had some kind of drug-like anti-resistance control over you." 

"The hardest thing to put out of my mind..." I paused, trying to phrase it diplomatically so I didn't hurt his feelings. 

He finished for me. "Was that it was my face?" 

I nodded in humiliation. 

"Oh, Daniel." He pulled me to my feet and hugged me. His breath on my ear made my heart race with fear. 

"I love you, Jack." I couldn't stop myself from saying it. 

"Love you, too, Daniel." he whispered without hesitation. 

I expected him to pull away, but he stayed. For the moment, I allowed myself to believe that his love was the kind I needed, that he needed me the same way. My right hand found it's way to his wet hair and began to stroke it while my left hand rubbed gentle erratic patterns on his back. I felt my fear rapidly mutate into an insane buzz that should have frightened the shit out of me. 

Recklessly, I bent my knees to sit on the bed again, pulling him down with me. It surprised me that he came down so easily, that he allowed this kind of intimacy to happen between us. 

He rose up a bit so he could look tenderly into my eyes and that single expression on his handsome face gave me goosebumps. 

His scent was a hundred times sweeter than I remembered. I wanted to consume him. I wanted to own him completely. Absorbed in my own fantasies as I shared his gaze, I recognized that I was already obsessed with him and would always be. Once I confirmed that he felt the same for me, there would be no looking back. I belonged to him, body and soul. And I would accept no less than the same from him. He was mine, damn it and nothing short of death could come between us. 

His eyes closed for a moment, and when he looked at me again, it was with uncertainty. I touched his lips with my fingers and let my blue eyes go wide in hesitation. 

"Daniel, I don't want you traumatized any worse than you've already been," he said, retrieving both my hands and holding them between his own. "We came here to help you, not to add to your problems." 

I kissed his hands. "But I want this with you. I do." 

"Are you sure you're thinking clearly?" 

"I'm never sure. Jack, tell me the truth. Have you ever considered a relationship with me?" 

He sighed and confessed with a nod. I felt a thrill like never before. 

"Yeah, I've definitely thought a lot about it." His eyes lingered on my lips. 

"Then let's stop wasting time," I implored softly. "Life is too short." 

I heard a hitch in his voice when he gave denial one more try. "I don't think you..." 

"Jack, this no longer has anything to do with Jovane West. Maybe he's smarter than we know. Maybe he saw this and was just acting on it. Whatever the case, it's not about him any more. It's all about you and me." 

He hugged me again, this time with less inhibition. It was glorious. "You're not going to regret this later, are you?" he asked as his fingers combed through my shaggy hair. 

"Never," I assured him. 

I kissed his cheek and he blushed. It occurred to me that Janet had been absolutely correct that he was even more repressed and diffident than I, and somehow, that made me love him even more. Bolder, I lightly kissed his lips. "Be with me tonight, Jack. I want it to be you. I want the real Jack." 

I could see him overcoming and his own demons. "You don't know how much I want this, Daniel, but..." 

I threw my inhibitions aside. "Stop right there," I said, and kissed him again. "No buts." 

He pretended to be stymied. "Really? Because I thought maybe..." 

For the first time in weeks, I laughed out loud. "My butt is yours, Jack." 

I knew this cheap motel bed was going to get some serious mileage between this night and Monday morning. And by that time, I would have forgotten all about that other thing that happened...whatever it was.


End file.
